Adeboro

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Cooking

I mistakenly sent this mail to my mother-in-law and I don’t know what to do. 

Dear Ma, 

Good evening. 

I am glad I can talk to you about certain things that have been troubling me since my marriage commenced. I am glad you do not judge and you’re a well-enlightened woman; flexible enough to put yourself in the shoes of the young and upcoming lady.

How can I put this succinctly? I hate cooking! The worst place in our house is the kitchen; I always dread going in there. I mean; I have to go there to cook, but I just hate going there. 

When I was living alone, I went to the kitchen only to warm food in the microwave and to look out of the window over the the other compound and beg my friend to bring food to my house. 

My marriage is on the brink and I honestly don’t blame my husband. He had no idea how bad things were when we got married. I just told him, ‘Yes. I can cook. You will be surprised!’ And I made sure I criticized every food we ate when we ate out. I’d be like, ‘Na wa o. Are we paying for the Maggi they packed inside this food?’ Or ‘The person that cooked this food has a problem with blending garlic and onions.’ I did this even when the food was super delicious. I did it just to look like someone who knew her onions (pun intended).

I don’t know what I was thinking when we got married. How did I think I’d dodge this 3-square bullet. My husband and I fight everyday because I can’t make basic jollof rice. He has even given up on asking for swallow or soup. 

Our food timetable is loyally sustained by oats, indomie, sandwiches, pancakes and custard. ‘After all,‘ I told him, ‘that’s what white people eat and they have not died and been erased from the earth’ 

His constant complaints are beginning to irritate me and I’m honestly beginning to dislike him. 

I dislike him and I dislike my kitchen. But at this point I’m just trying to figure out which one I dislike more. 

What do I do ma?

I only helped my friend compose this mail! She’s the one going through this situation and she needed to send a mail to one of those online marriage experts. I offered to help her compose the mail and here we are. 

Now I need someone to help me compose an explanation mail to my mother-in-law. 


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