Adeboro

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when wolves become shepherds

‘Perhaps’ is the word I heard 

In my head

As I woke up this morning

 

Perhaps I should not be a Nigerian lawyer

I should not know the law enough;

Know the justice system enough;

Know lawyers enough

Know the country enough

To know these wolves might never get convicted.

 

Perhaps I should not be a Christian

I should not know God

And His heart for us, His children

I should not know how mindful He is of us

I should not know the great lengths He has gone to show His love

Maybe I wouldn’t be so heartbroken to see how they are being treated

 

Perhaps I should not be a Nigerian

I should not have access to foolish thinking

To crass comments

To rape apologetics 

I should not have my innocence corrupted – 

To believe that there indeed are stupid questions

‘Why is she just speaking now after 17 years?’ (sic)

‘Why did she not struggle with the rapist?’ (sic)

‘What was she wearing?’ (sic)

‘Why did she become his friend if she didn’t want something more than that?’ (sic)

‘How was he able to rape her a second time?’ (sic)

‘What does she have to gain from this revelation?’ (sic)

‘Do you not fear God?’ (sic)

For the record,

Everyone who poses questions such as this is sick.

 

Perhaps, I should not truly understand who a Pastor is

That she or he is a person 

To whom God (who is good and has no evil) 

Entrusts the care of his children

That she or he is a person

Who is to lead others spiritually

To point them to the love and light to Christ

Perhaps if I do not have this understanding

I would not cringe every time I hear 

“Pastor Wolf”

 

I am so tired

So enraged by how disillusioned we are as a people

We do not value God

Because we do not value life

 

We are so carnally minded

We who are supposed to be spiritually discerning –

To know what the devil looks like

To know his tricks

To know anti-christ signs –

We are the ones now enabling these things

 

We would rather romanticize the idea of an office

Or a position

Than fear the Lord

 

God’s heart is broken 

Because mine is

And mine is 

Because His is

 

He doesn’t want his anointed touched

He definitely doesn’t want her raped

 

I did not think I’d cry writing this

But here I am 

Potentially destroying my computer

Perhaps if I didn’t know all of this

My life and my computer would be better off

But perhaps they wouldn’t. 

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